"Happy" 4th

I'm missing my son's first fireworks because I'm sick and because it's stupidly hot outside. It's 8:45 p.m., and it's 93 degrees outside with a heat index of 99. What the #$%@? I've felt lousy all evening, so I'm at home with a bowl of Crispix, watching the episode of When Weather Changed History about the Challenger explosion. Interesting show, especially since I was only 5 years old when it happened and didn't really get the details at the time, but I'd much rather be watching Kent spazz out on the levee while watching the fireworks.

It was important to me that Kent still get to do it now that he's old enough to watch them, even if his preggo mom didn't feel up to it, so Jack took him a little while ago, and now I'm feeling sad and lonely. I wondered after they left whether there was a place we could have watched from the comfort of our car, but it's not really possible to get close enough to see and still escape the hoards of traffic, and it'll be way more fun for Kent to be out on the levee with his fun daddy anyway. And there will be more fireworks in years to come. I'm just bummed that I'm missing this. Oh well. Beta will get his/her first fireworks later, and at least I should be around for that, unless I lose my mind and decide to get pregnant again. Hey, future Erica, when you're reading this and reminiscing about pregnancy and tiny babies, remember that the first trimester is MISERABLE. SERIOUSLY. And you're older than I am now, so if you find yourself wanting a third child, you should probably adopt.

We got some disappointing news at the pharmacy today. I've been taking the generic version of Zofran, the best defense for most women against pregnancy nausea, for the last week and a half. It doesn't keep me from feeling queasy, but it does keep me from throwing up. I got my first round of 12 pills for less than $8, but I took my last one this morning, so I was ready for a refill. We went to pick them up this afternoon, and the pharmacist informed us that our insurance would only cover 12 pills every 23 days, and not enough time had passed yet, so we'd have to pay out of pocket. $120 for another 12 pills, I kid you not. How we go from $8 to $120 is a mystery to me, but it's completely frustrating. I didn't buy them. I figured I'd just deal with it until the middle of the month when I can get another refill, and Jack is going to call our insurance company to make sure that it's all true and to try to figure out if there's anything we can do besides lodge a serious complaint. I've not ever really felt like the victim of a stupid insurance policy before, but now, I'm upset. Are they thinking that I might only be sick on alternating days?? I'll probably only be sick for another month or so anyway; could I just get an advance on my future allowance? I know they wouldn't do that. Dumb, all of it. This is nothing compared to what Nicole has gone through for her insulin pump and supplies, or what people with expensive and very serious diseases like cancer have to endure, but I'm still questioning the wisdom of this policy, especially as it affects my ability to parent Kent and to feel like I'm maintaining my own health while I carry a baby.

So, uh, Happy 4th of July. I should just go to bed.

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Yuck! I especially hate being sick when it makes me miss family times! Hang in there, Sweetie.

Love, Mom
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